100 confessions

Category: Life

1. I feel really stupid a lot of the time
2. Getting something right makes me feel superior
3. I hate making people cry
4. I only lie because I'm afraid my life is uninteresting
5. I secretly love hugs but I'm terrified of people touching me
6. I fall in love within twenty seconds of meeting a girl with bi-polar disorder
7. or any girl with too much eye make up on
8. I think way too much
9. Simple things make me smile
10. I remember all of my friends
11. And half of them don't remember me
12. Being upside down is my biggest phobia
13. except for my fear of pubic hair
14. I am less secure about my cock size than I appear
15. I always know what someone feels towards me
16. and it hurts that they never know how I feel
17. Ramen is my primary food source
18. I am afraid to succeed because I don't want my friends to look bad
19. I am a virgin
20. and I'm afraid that I'll stay that way
21. I am horny ALL the time
22. I crave narcotics everyday
23. I know how to build a bomb
24. and I've done it before
25. I wish for the zombie apocalypse
26. Because I could survive, and I would save you
27. Eyes and hands are the only part of the body I can draw
28. I can never remember what type of music I am supposed to like
29. I fake disgust when people listen to Britney spears
30. I think masturbation is freakish
31. but I do it anyway
32. Beer is gross
33. but being sober is unbearable
34. I had a stroke last week.
35. I lied so that I wouldn't have to go to the hospital
36. now I'm scared I have cancer
37. I collect bones
38. I have a low pain thresh-hold
39. But I cut myself anyway
40. blood is delicious
41. I have had a hairy back longer than I have had pubes
42. I think that I am more than human
43. but I can't figure out how
44. Cats hate me
45. the feeling is mutual
46. porn is depressing
47. I can't imagine sex being beter than foreplay
48. I think I have multiple mental illnesses
49. I look down on people who believe in god
50. Ignorance should be punishable by death
51. Driving is scarier than roller coasters
52. My parents can be cool sometimes
53. I don't think I'm a bad person
54. but I tell people I am because its easier
55. I make excuses no to see my friends
56. because I think I disappoint them
57. Purple isn't really my favorite color
58. but I feel obligated to be consistent by wearing it every day
59. I stole a mannequin hand on Wednesday April 29 2009
60. I can't cry when I'm sad
61. but I weep when I'm bored
62. I am more confident than I sound
63. I break rules on a moral basis
64. Knives and swords are amazing
65. I can beat anyone at pinball
66. My best friends are not who you would ever guess
67. I hate all sports except fencing, cycling and soccer
68. I think weed should be legal
69. even though I got clean
70. Chances are, I'm smarter than you
71. and that makes me lonely
72. Chess makes me happy
73. I really am a Hippie
74. I will go down on almost anyone
75. But I won't allow anyone near my dick
76. Music is the only thing that keeps me from killing myself
77. or you for that matter
78. Kiwis are the best fruit ever
79. If I've ever given you a gift or bought you something, I love you
80. and I always will
81. "normal people" don't exist
82. I own two walkie talkie sets
83. and have no one to talk to
84. I really have attempted suicide eight times
85. I'm glad I failed
86. My immune system is abnormally strong
87. so I play sick to get attention
88. I like dogs more than people
89. Anorexia is sexy
90. I have hairy toes
91. I insert cooler people into my real stories
92. I won't lie to anyone I really love
93. which isn't that many people
94. If I've ever loved you, I always will
95. I think I already said that one
96. I love stupid movies
97. But great movies make me philosophical
98. My taste in music is always changing
99. Green is my real favorite color
100. If you read all of these than you still don't get me.

The product of Ninjas and Guitars

Current mood:Vibrant
Category: Music

Of Summer And Death

I was walkin down the streets of houston on a hot summa's day
when I came across a tree frog, an' I said "Hey!"
"you a frog?"
an' he said "are you a man?"

So I got to thinkin in the noonday sun
An' I never did see that son of a gun
But he robbed me blind
Shot me dead, with a colt 45,
I wont say its nice, but I don't mind

(Solo)

I say "What's in yo head?"
I feel the whole world turnin
when I lay in my bed
And nothin feels special,
My skin starts to crawl
And the devil starts speakin
In his southern drawl

This song means nothin
Not a god damned thing
Cuz life ain't worth livin
Winter, fall or spring

I'd keep on goin but I got nothin else
Its your problem now
Just you and yourself

So go for a walk
an' think for a while
Ima keep on livin with my alligator smile

(solo)

Incarceration

So tomorrow I go back to in-school suspension, to complete the last six days of my term. I have had almost no contact with the outside world for a week now, being both incarcerated at school and at home. I have a low grade fever and I'm dizzy from the cleaning fluids I've worked with all day. Thank god for Michael Crighton, I've been re-reading the Jurassic park series, and its the only thing keeping me sane. It has rained constantly all weekend, and the view from my window is a sodden mess. Ugh, I realize that I am rambling but the combination of captivity, sickness and the shock of being disrespected by my pseudo-pupils has left me crotchety and incoherent.
Top Five sickness songs:

1. Blue Eyes -Carey Brothers
2. Guernica -Brand New
3. Fork and Knife -Brand New
4. Bohemian Rhapsody -Queen
5. Alpha Male and Canine Mystery Blood -Tommy Womack
   

Psych

I recently took a battery of psychological evaluations, just out of curiosity over what they would show. After answering as honestly as possible, I received a consistent result from them all; I'm insane in nearly every way possible. Now, this is quite clearly not the case, as some of the results such as depressive and histrionic clearly cancel each other out. What I have concluded is this: Every man, woman, and child possesses within them, many of the characteristics or emotions of someone deemed 'Insane' at some point in their life. Nobody is textbook normal, it just doesn't happen. Far more likely than my pan-insanity, would be a case of Bipolar disorder compounded by borderline personality. If I were Bipolar, then my highs and lows, and the sudden transitions would explain away much of the extraneous diagnoses, and the borderline personality would give context to my schizotypal reactions. Overall, I am no more insane than any one else, and I knew that before the tests, however I think it is great fun to see how the psychological norm differs from reality on an individual basis.

As a reward for being patient, and reading through this dense block of text, here is my current Top Five Metal Songs:

1. Warriors of Time -Black Tide
2. All Nightmare Long -Metallica
3. Eruption -Van Halen
4. Beast and the Harlot - Avenged Sevenfold
5. Shout -Black Tide